How to behave in conflicts

The longer you hold a leadership position, the more you take it for granted. But that does not mean you have nothing to be criticized for, and no one dares to do so. Quite the opposite, the criticism will only increase noif you react with resentment and anger to comments. The result is a conflict situation that may shake your confidence, and as we remember, confidence is the foundation for a leader’s charisma. So stay calm, and then figure out what to do.

You first need to determine whether another person is right and if criticism of you is constructive. I will tell you how to do this.

“Calling a friend” is what I call the first technique. It involves making a real call to someone close to you, whose opinion you value and who you can trust. Don’t hesitate to share with them and ask for their opinion about the situation — if your opponent is right, should you defend your point of view or agree with them? For example, sometimes friends didn’t criticize me because they didn’t want to hurt me, but when I first criticized myself, they sometimes agreed.

The technique I call “Brainstorming” does not require a second participant. You have to ask yourself, “Why is the other person criticizing me? What is my mistake? Is there any truth in what they are saying? Are they trying to help me or hurt me?” You will need to analyze this and answer honestly, so let your opponent know you need time. Say, “I’ll think about it.” If the criticism is unfounded, your main trump cards are calmness and a reasoned response. Give yourself the right attitude: “I am calm because the truth is on my side.”

As a rule, in several cases, people attack with baseless criticism: to improve their self-esteem, show off, or to make you lose your temper and occupy the leadership position. Are you ready to stress over such a person? Better show understanding and sincerely sympathize with them – you remember what I said about such people, don’t you? Only people who are insecure and have issues behave this way.

Forgive your opponent, but don’t let the attack go unpunished. The ideal response would be, “I don’t care what you think about this issue,” or “Let’s first get to the bottom of the situation.” Sounds powerful, doesn’t it? After that answer, few people will want to continue the conversation (which is what you need).

If the criticism is justified, you should acknowledge that your opponent is right. In this case, you have already made the first important step to resolving the conflict. Congratulations, you are a wise and reasonable person! This situation obliges you to react to any criticism calmly. Take it not as an insult but as a chance to work on yourself and become even better.